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Task 2 첨삭 부탁드립니다!

CINDYYY | 조회 191 | 추천 0
  • 2017.01.10
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■ Direction You have 20 minutes to plan and write your response. You response will be judge on the basis of The quality of writing and on how well your response presents the points in the lecture and the relationship to the reading passage. Typically, an effective response will be 150 to 225 words.
■ Question Summarize the points made in the lecture you just heard, explaining how they cast doubt on the points made in the reading


▶ Topic : Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes such as a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children. 

To what extent do you agree or disagree?


▶ Your Answer :

These days, some activities helping other people regardless of getting paid have been disregarded by degrees in high school programmes. It has been a generally accepted fact all over the world that helping others in difficulties is imperative to live together in society. I totally agree that the unpaid helping service should be encouraged more in the high school curriculums. 

 It is widely believe that voluntary works help students build up appropriate minds, yet in the high school of late, it more concentrates on the study for a test which is required when high school students enter an university. As for one of prestigious researchs from an university, a number of university students have a lack of sociability and a sense of humanity which may be derived from the high concentrated on the curriculum focusing on the entrance exam for universities. 

 To bring up the sociability and a sense of humanity, voluntary service should be fostered in the high school program. It is of paramount importance when adolescents prepare to become adults. The young people can learn many things though the voluntary work such as the value of charity, the importance of environment, or the new possibility by teaching younger children. Therefore, they can aware of how valuable the unpaid services are. 

To sum up, in the era of highlighting on the money-valued success, it is important that young students learn about the value of unpaid voluntary works. This is valuable for not only the sociability of students, but also the sense of humanity. For these reasons, I considerably agree about the unpaid community experience for high school students. 


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10613 답글 [Task2] RE:Task1 첨삭 부탁드립니다!! 항상 감사합니다! meer 173 2017.01.13
>> [Task2] Task 2 첨삭 부탁드립니다! CINDYYY 192 2017.01.10
10611 답글 [Task2] RE:Task 2 첨삭 부탁드립니다! meer 173 2017.01.13
10610 [Task2] 첨삭 부탁드립니다. pana 207 2017.01.09
10609 답글 [Task2] RE:첨삭 부탁드립니다. meer 177 2017.01.14
10608 [Task1] 첨삭 부탁드립니다. 사진 pana 222 2017.01.09
10607 답글 [Task1] RE:첨삭 부탁드립니다. 사진 [1] Soo 203 2017.01.13
10606 [Task2] TASk2 첨삭 부탁드립니다 감사합니다~! cindy7767 218 2017.01.09
10605 답글 [Task2] RE:TASk2 첨삭 부탁드립니다 감사합니다~! Soo 172 2017.01.13
10604 [첨삭] 첨삭부탁드립니다.감사합니다. 영어보이 170 2017.01.08
10603 답글 [첨삭] RE:첨삭부탁드립니다.감사합니다. Soo 178 2017.01.13
10602 [첨삭] 첨삭부탁드려요.감사합니다. 영어보이 195 2017.01.08
10601 답글 [첨삭] RE:첨삭부탁드려요.감사합니다. Soo 181 2017.01.13
10600 [첨삭] 첨삭부탁드립니다 TASK@2 203 2017.01.07
10599 답글 [첨삭] RE:첨삭부탁드립니다 Soo 186 2017.01.13
10598 [Task2] TASk2 첨삭 부탁드립니다 감사합니다~! cindy7767 214 2017.01.07
10597 답글 [Task2] RE:TASk2 첨삭 부탁드립니다 감사합니다~! Soo 196 2017.01.13
10596 [Task1] task 1 첨삭부탁드립니다 !! 감사합니다!! cindy7767 218 2017.01.07
10595 답글 [Task1] RE:task 1 첨삭부탁드립니다 !! 감사합니다!! meer 175 2017.01.12
10594 [Task2] 첨삭부탁드려요. 오델로 230 2017.01.07